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Feel free to contact me with further questions if you wish. In response to the question about writing with baby, it all depends on your support system and your baby. I moved to Berkeley from Canada when my son was 4 months old, so that my husband could start his PhD work. I had planned to have my PhD finished before we moved, but I developed pre-eclampsia during my pregnancy and was on bed rest for 2 months (the last week, hospitalized) before his C-section birth. I was very lucky: my son was a good, healthy baby. We could set our watches by him, he was so predictable in his routine: he nursed every four hours, napped on schedule, etc. That helped. I just found that I had to be very disciplined. It took about 2 months before I was getting enough sleep to be really productive, but after that it got easier. When he was awake, we went for walks, to the park, shopping, etc. When he slept, I raced to my computer and worked. I shut off the phone, refused to answer doors, etc, during the day when he was napping, so that I could work.
At night when my husband was home, he would help out. And on weekends, he would take the baby out to give me time to work. I also took my son to a conference when he was 10 weeks old (with my mother-in-law along for help). I defended my dissertation in Canada a year after he was born, and even managed to publish 3 papers. So, it can be done. HOWEVER: my advice is to get lots of help. A bouncy chair or swing by the computer also helps: I would sing to my son while I typed. I wrote most of my dissertation after I had had my son and I can give you some (rather obvious) advice. First of all, I thought that since newborn babies sleep all the time (it said so in all the books) I would have lots of time to write. You know how that works.
In the first 7 months of my son’s life I wrote literally wrote two sentences. The most important things are: get enough sleep. Otherwise your brain won’t work right and no matter how much you tell yourself you must do things, you simply won’t be able to do them. If this involves taking midday naps, going to bed early, sleeping late, whatever it takes, you must do it. In my case this involved living with my parents for a summer and getting 3 free days a week to write, not my ideal situation, but it worked. Last, set up a schedule to allow for the above and stick to it. Babies and children in general usually respond well to schedules, and when you see your slow but steady progress you will stop feeling so panicked and stressed. I have been working on my dissertation ever since my son was born a year and a half ago. It has been hard. Very hard. However, I am beginning to make good progress. Things that have helped are setting a schedule that works for myself and my husband.
We have no child care outside the home, so I work evenings and weekends. These times are also looked at as special time for my husband and son. It is tiring and many times I have wanted to give up, but I think of it as a short-term sacrifice for a long term goal. Sure it can be done. Go to any graduation and you’ll see lots of Dr. Moms and Dads toting babies on their hips in their graduation gowns. It isn’t fun, but it can be done. I wouldn’t mention this to your committee, but think hard about practical matters as well as scholarly ones. Is your research in a lab close by, or does it require hours of travel to interview subjects? Can you choose a site close by? Can you conduct research on a schedule that matches your childcare or other parents’ availability? Factor in childcare costs and how much time away you want to spend. The older the baby, the more you’ll need childcare.