Final Exam Excuse Contest 2010. I have numbered them so that you can vote on your favorite in the poll at the end of the post. Some of these are real e-mails from students; some are not. Some are easy to detect as fakes; some are not. I hope the group-wallow in parody and sympathy will be emotionally satisfying in some way, or at least mildly entertaining. In the meantime, I am going on a blog-break while my family and I travel to an interesting part of the world. I shall likely return in early January. Thanks for reading, and please vote in the poll at the end of this post. I am honestly, truly sorry for missing the final exam in your case. I am not usually so irresponsible and this is completely out of character for me. However, I feel that I should ask that you excuse my exam, in that one of my housemates was in the emergency room and I had to be there with him. You can check with the ER to prove that I did not just forget the exam.

I have had some bad luck lately and I would never of missed the exam because your class is one of my favorites, but you know what they say: friends first. I am wondering if I would be able to make up the exam this Saturday, which is the only chance I have before my flight home for Christmas. I know you might want to take off points for the late exam, but I really am afraid about how it would affect my GPA, and I am a Senior. Thus, I could also do an extra credit project, if that would help you to give me the grade I really deserve were it not for missing the final. I will do any project you want, because I am very greatful to you for helping me even though I had my friend in the hospital. However, I might need to turn in my extra credit project after Christmas because I am going home and also my computer is at IT with a virus and I can’t get my files off it.

They said it would be done by now, so I have no idea when I’ll get it. Is it ok if I can get an incomplete so that I can do my best work on the extra credit project? Also, I could take the final exam after Christmas so that I can really demonstrate my best work for this class, but I understand completely if you want me to take it on Saturday. 6 pls let me know which is best for u. A in this course. SENSELESS LOSS OF LIFE. My grandmother died today, or was it yesterday? I missed the midterm. I was miserably sick last week. Had I known about the exam, I would not have given this to her! Please allow Student Y to make up the exam. I cannot drive right now. HELP, what should I do? I frgot 2 come to the final exam yesterday! Chem midterm and my Psych paper it TOTALLY slipped my mind! I get back from break? I’m super super sorry for the trouble! Thanks soooooooooooooooo much in advance! I will come to your office then and take the exam. I am really an A student and if you want to take into account my difficult circumstances and how hard I worked in your class an A would be good. Thanks for your help. I could email you until now. I could take the exam after the break.

The third…. Matthias, you are on my list buddy. At the least I think I got through to him that he would be staying after school every time he caused disruptions, a fate far worse than being beaten in his eyes. As an aside, let’s talk about corporal punishment. As I’ve said countless times, it is illegal in Namibia, yet still occurs regularly. This means that while it still happens at my school, legally speaking if a parent were to file a complaint against the teacher that my principal would not be able to defend him/her. In my opinion, corporal punishment will continue in the schools as long as a culture of violence prevails in the country. Stopping violence in the schools, while a good start, is not stopping the extreme violence that many of my kids experience on a daily basis at home, whether they are being beaten by their parents or witnessing domestic violence. It is endlessly frustrating to me to try and propose alternatives because most of the Namibians I have spoken to about this really and truly believe it works.

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